It’s time. That time of the day

When I should sleep away.

But I don’t. I just lie here on the edge

Of the empty, unmade bed

With my hands like a noose

Dangling in the air…. And dripping

Red and warm blood, so different from yours.

Right?

 

But do you still have it? In your veins?

Or has it all dried away leaving you as hollow

As you left me on a winter cock-crow.

In the slaughter house where my pieces were sold.

And you watched as he bought them to feed his bitches.

He? No. This one’s about you and that ungodly visit

To you new bedroom.

 

Are bats and owls still your only companion?

Are they somehow better than I, and all you left behind?

With the neck of my white gown slipping off my shoulder

And hair tussling with the wind and dust

My bare feet made their way you to your bed-

Scraping themselves as desperation drags them forward.

After sneaking through the guarded door- or was it gate?

 

We had dug it for you just weeks ago

I had begged them not to though

I had jumped in with you but they pulled me out.

I had tried so many times to reach you

But I always wake up in a different kind of white room.

Anyway, I stumble till the hump and fall over you

And clawed and dug to remove the filthy quilt over you.

I though it must be suffocating you.

I wanted to slip in too and lie with you

 

I kept digging with my naked hands,

As stone slashed my innocent flesh

And mud intruded my virgin wounds.

“Wake up” “wake up” I screamed and screamed

And they came, but you didn’t

And again they pulled me away.

From you and him.

Mother said he was not for me

She was right. She also said you loved me

But then why did you leave me? She lied.

 

I had made my way to the graveyard

In the middle of the night.

I stealth like a snake that was you

You always had a devil in you

Didn’t you?

I was quite taken by it.

You? Where have you come from now?

It’s about him and the way he had done

Just what you chose to do merely a decade later.

 

He was swallowed by the darkness

You chose to inject me with. And now I’m dripping red

Hoping it would take out the black as well.

You see, I have loved only two men in my life

One died; the other left

And I don’t know which hurts more.

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